The War on Men...

A woman named Aretha in New York has started a campaign on men called "Man Spreading"

What she claims and we will quote: "All you jerks with wide stances are breaking the social contract that we need to abide by in New York City. There are lots of things that men do that are crazy, like insist on trying to impress people by regurgitating lines from Adam Sandler movies and investing scores of time in that imaginary monstrosity that is fantasy football. But there is no worse, man-centric behavior than manspreading on the subway. Seriously guys, it has got to stop."

She goes on to say: "As a human male who possesses a penis, I can say that there is no possible way that your package is that big that you need to sit with your legs spread like the Grand Canyon. And if you have a package so large – as in an actual parcel – that is making you sit like this, you probably should do yourself and the world a favor and spring for a cab."

She goes on to chastise men and name call them and even brings up LA for their outbursts at Celebrities. Where this comes from no one will ever know :-D

She's just putting gasoline on her fire to make a bigger smoke signal to get as many women on board her campaign.

The interesting thing in all of this is that after she calls men every name in the book, she finishes with: "If you don’t like it, you can buy a bike and just ride everywhere. And if you really don’t like it, then you can move. Or better yet, you can stand. There are some of us who would also like a seat and we know how to use it." Referring obviously to an "ONLY WOMAN ALLOWED STATE"

The confusing part is what she says at the very beginning of her tirade: "We should already be showing everyone some R-E-S-P-E-C-T, as Aretha says."

Maybe she meant, everyone but...her ;-)

The first response of Men is expletive this and expletive that, but make sure you get all that out by yelling it into a pillow first.

The reason being is that as you know with arguments, the minute you act like this lady did, you'll lose the argument and people will only focus on the outburst.

Which in turn will give this woman's campaign wheels due to the, he yelled at me and used foul language clause.

First of all she has done absolutely no research into the matter and even goes as far as saying...oh this is rich, "As a human male who possesses a penis, I can say that there is no possible way that your package is that big that you need to sit with your legs spread like the Grand Canyon."

"As a human male who possesses a penis, I can say...NOTHING ARETHA, BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE A PENIS! So your campaign lacks merit from the get go.

This woman has taken nothing into account like, the Height and Weight of a Man, does the man have Elephantiasis of the Balls, does the man have an enlarged Prostate and of course the size of the actual genitals itself.

The average gap of a man's legs are 12" measuring from the inside of the knees.

You know we have never seen a Bow Legged Woman, but we sure have seen a Bow Legged Man and that's genetic, so there must be a purpose to why men's legs need to spread.

Women do not have a penis between their legs, they have a vertical depression.

When their is nothing between the gap guess what...the...gap...closes, but if you have something between the gap...it...stays...open.

Women have the opposite of Bow Legs they have inverted knees or Peanut Butter knees is the used term to explain the immediate collapse of not having something between the gap.

We can actually agree with this woman to a degree that some men do spread their legs entirely too far apart and if they are wearing tight pants the E.O.B. or Enlarged Prostate won't apply.

There is actually a happy medium here and if maybe she came out with a more eloquent and polite way of mentioning her findings, men might be willing to try, but when you present yourself immaturely and call Men and Cities names well...all bets are off.

Two wrongs don't make a right and men you don't need to do wrong, because if you do you will lose, why...WOMEN CAN DO NO WRONG!

Example: John and Lorena Bobbitt:
"At some point during the night, Lorena got out of bed and went to the kitchen for a drink of water. Grabbing the knife, she entered the bedroom where John was sleeping and cut off his entire penis starting at the base.

After seven hours of deliberation, the jury found Lorena 'not guilty' due to insanity causing an irresistible impulse to sexually wound John. As a result, she could not be held liable for her actions. Under state law, the judge ordered her to undergo a 45-day evaluation period at Central State Hospital, located in Petersburg, Virginia, after which she would be released."

So even though you may win the Argument you lose the war.

Let's give you some arguments:

1. The Polite Argument, try rationalizing the situation which won't go far because this woman has already showed her hand, but smile and remind "EVERYONE" that you tried being polite.

2. She has mentioned that there is "NO" reason why you should be sitting like this and that if you can't then you need to figure out another mode of transportation. This statement can be settled in just one word...D-I-S-C-R-I-M-I-N-A-T-I-O-N, your ace in the hole ;-)

3. Gender Profiling

4. Defamation of Character

5. Slander

6. Libel

Now, you have to be careful because women have what they call the "TEAR" which runs like a river after a rain, but lacks validity.

We have seen a woman cry over spilled milk...SPILLED MILK!

When women know the "TEAR" isn't going to work they'll use Violence and when she lashes out, and she will, you'll have two more arguments, Assault and Battery.

However, remember the Lorena Bobbitt clause: WOMEN CAN DO NO WRONG...and that's a fact!