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Saturday, December 20, 2014

The Slowest Store In America

We would have to say that KMART is the slowest store in America.

It starts all the way out into the street and the driveway that goes into the KMART stores.

Once you finally get into the KMART parking lot start your stop watch, it will take you 15-20 minutes just to get parked.

Then it will take you at least 5 minutes just to get to the door because for some reason people don't know how to drive anything in the KMART parking lots.

Cars are just driving around going nowhere and then you the have people with carts that just sort of go side to side with a look of bewilderment on why they were at KMART to begin with, let alone thinking where there car is.

Then you finally get to the front door and you want to walk in, but you can't because there is always someone standing right in the middle of the door.

They just stand there and talk to whoever will listen and start telling them about their experience getting into the parking lot today, followed by a little giggle.

The people linger in the middle of the hallways and just look at you like deer caught in headlights, almost as if they are looking to you for answers.

Then they just turn and linger then fade away, very strange, sort of Zombie :-(

When you finally get to your item you are looking for, roughly 2 hours later, you'll remember why you went there.

The prices are great and the items are pretty good quality, and that makes you feel good all over again...

Then the checkout with the Zombies...

Oh this is by far the worse feature of KMART, their computers are the slowest I have ever seen, as a matter of fact, I don't think I have seen a computer that slow because I WOULDN'T USE IT IF IT WAS!

They'll ask you for your rewards card and of course, they don't have an actual card, you just give them your number and this is the best part of the checkout experience.

Can you see it, the non-English speaking person in front of you trying to understand English...what's your number...huh...your number, what's your number please...huh...

Oh, then if they do break the language barrier, it's the wrong number and then they will go into an email solution.

Do you have an email...huh...an email, do you have an email...yes...what is it...huh...your email, what is it...yes, I have email...okay...

Then they finally get that email in there and of course it's wrong...do you have another email...huh...another email, do you have one...huh...

The prices are never right when it comes to specials and that's when it gets really fun because you now have to call over a manager.

Manager...MANAGER NEEDED ON REGISTER 1...manager...manager...bueller...bueller...

KMART you need a card and that would really speed things up. Asking for a customer to verbalize information in the security conscience minds we have today is asking for trouble.

Now getting out of KMART is just as bad as getting in, there are no shortcuts, the door huggers are still lingering around so pace yourself.

Going to KMART for a few items is a Half Day venture, so this Christmas season you may want to think about planning out the day to spend at KMART if you need to buy more than just a few items.

Just so you know right...just so you know ;-)

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